Two Steps Forward. One Step Back.

Two steps forward. One step back.

This is how my year has gone so far. Obstacle after obstacle has been thrown my way. I've hardly managed to make headway with my projects. I feel like one of those rubber octopus that you throw at a fridge door; the ones that would stick until very, very slowly they would lose their grip and fall to the ground.

Except in my case, I'm still holding on.

Spring is here. And I've barely noticed. I took some great pictures at the Cherry Blossom festival back in March. I've been meaning to post them for the longest time. The pictures follow after my post.

Two steps forward. One step back.

I go to the Nevermore Film Festival back in February. Have a great time. Come back and BloodyNews just collapses. Can't publish the wonderful festival articles I wrote.

Two steps forward. One step back.

My film A WALK IN THE PARK wins 2nd place at the Camm Slamm last September. Yet, the John Hopkins Film Festival conveniently 'forgets' about my film submissions this year. It's a no-go also with my Maryland Film Festival submission this year, though I got a very nice note from Skizz (I think I got more out of that note than from any chance at getting into the festival this year).

Two steps forward. One step back.

I pay for my car about a year ago. It's all mine, finally. This year, I've a freak accident in I-83 during April: The hood of my car flies open while I'm driving at 60 mph on a Sunday afternoon. Luckily, the front windshield of my car doesn't shatter, and I manage to drive to the shoulder of the road. My insurance covers the cost of the damage--about two grand.

About two weeks later, the brakes on my car sound like heavy metal robots making love: The car needed over 600 bucks in brake work.

It doesn't end there. This has been the worse 'car trouble' season ever. Over a week ago, while at the Maryland Film Festival, my car was broken into, passenger window shattered, and my CD receiver was stolen.... for the second time.

Total cost of car repairs in the past month: About 3 and half grand. Thank the lord for State Farm insurance.

Two steps forward. One step back.

Just when I managed to get my situation at work under the control, things go to crap yet again. I'm told I better clamp down at work because I got no more leeway. God, please get me the hell out of Social Security!

I meet with a counselor at work and we talk about all this crap. It helps. But I won't be truly happy until I'm gone from that job.. until I fulfill my dream of being a full-time filmmaker. I tell him I know I can be a great filmmaker. I can feel it in my bones. Not sure if he believes me, but he's supportive.

Two steps forward: I re-enroll back in UMBC. I go back in the fall to finish my film degree. I need 7 courses now instead of the 2 I needed ten years ago--their degree requirements have changed significantly since way back then.

Two steps forward. One step back.

I almost completely missed out on festival season this year. I only caught one screening at the John Hopkins Film fest this year. I barely caught the Maryland Film Festival. Only went to 2 screenings this year. (And I got my car broken into on that night). Needless to say, I didn't enjoy the festival.

I should have gone to Tribeca. Blah. New York is so fucking expensive.

Two steps forward: I approached Wes Craven at the John Hopkins Film festival and gave him the first ever promo package for Project S. He said he would take a look at it. Major step right there.

Steps backward: I got friends that don't call, don't email. Nobody really hangs out anymore. Nobody wants to go to the movies. Male friends get girlfriends and just drop from the face of the earth. All of a sudden you're flat out alone.

Nah, I'm not bitter. I'm just venting. Like I said, I'm the rubber octopus... hanging off that fridge wall. I'm gonna be alright.

One step forward. Another step forward. I really, really need to thrive.

Enough bitchin'. Cherry Blossom pictures follow: (On second thought, Blogger was acting up last night and this post went up the next morning. I'll post pictures tonight)